FACTUALLY ACCURATE News on ALIEN 8 (Paradise) & 9 (Untitled)

I haven't touched on it much here but of course being that I love monsters, and ALIEN changed the landscape of monster movies in a fundamental way, plus the monster itself is just so damn cool, I've been a big fan of the series for a while, even since before I was of an appropriate age to even watch the fucking things, if that makes any sense.

And when I say "fan of the series," don't be alarmed, because I mean the literal interpretation of that phrase, which is to say I'm not an "Alien fan" but rather someone who actually enjoys the fucking movies. Yes, that's right, take a deep breath, because you will not see any oxymorons here, not from me. My admiration for the series is genuine, and to me "series" means more than one thing, meaning ALL seven of the films, plus an enormous percentage of the various other tangents all have their own merits to me, although in particular my favroite movie is the third one, with one of the big reasons being that Ripley, Hicks, and that stupid fucking annoying child die, fixing the terrible, terrible mistake of the previous film of trying to give a god damned Alien movie a happy ending, which is outright blasphemy.

So, to reiterate, I'm not an "Alien fan" who only likes the horrible James Cameron movie which was written at a 5th grade reading level and features all of the stupid, cheap bullshit in Titanic and Avatar, I like the Aliens themselves, and the world and the mythology they're a part of. I'm invested in the development of the series, as a whole, because this is what the actual definition of a fandom is, and that's I am, the actual definition of an Alien fan, not an "Alien fan." We clear?

Moving on!